GAIT

My husband and i have a strong philosophy when it comes to looking at alternative help for Walker.  We are all for it, as long as it does not cause him pain and that the methods are to give  him a better quality of life, not just search for answers.

Have I mentioned how great our social worker is??? She is fantastic and was able to find money for Walker to go to an alternative therapy center right around the corner from us.  Its called GAIT.  the idea is that while riding horses, children with special needs are able to learn confidence, work on their strength and also work one on one with a speech therapist. 

Our first appointment  to meet the director and tour the farm was wonderful.  I knew it was the right place for us, when the director came up to me while I was feeding Walker in the car, saw that I had two children, and said we could talk right there without having to get everyone out of the car.  I thought "boy, these people get it!" Martha was very detailed about explaining how everything works, reassuring me that the horses that are used are the gentlest. We set up our next appointment and I was very excited.  (Did I mention how great our social worker is?)

His first session went pretty well considering it was at 3:30pm, and I had to wake him up from nap in order to get there on time.  There were three people, two on each side of him and one leading the horse.  Peter, the horse, was very mellow and looked like he knew the drill.  Equipped with a helmet, they put Walker on Peter backwards lying down.   It is a lot of work with the helmet on for Walker to keep his head up, so he rested it on the rump of the horse.  He seemed to like to feel of the movement and the horse's hair.  A few times they stopped and had him sit up and ride a little, but they did not push him, instead just listened to his cues.

I am very excited for this opportunity to see how Walker does, its great sensory stimulation too!

Food issues

Gluten free
Dairy free
Soy free
No eggs

No onions

What do you feed a growing boy who can't chew? I am at a lost, and I feel that his rejection to food lately is because he is bored!  Yesterday I went against the diet and fed him a scrambled egg.  Actually, I had made it for Miss Poo but when she refused it and he wouldn't eat his pureed green beans, I gave it a try.  He loved it!  He was very happy mushing it around in his mouth!  And nothing bad happened, he seemed fine the rest of the day and slept well.  So what else do I give him? I have to admit, his diet is a lot of baby food, because... well... its  just a lot easier.  Yes, i am lazy, but baby food covers the main ingredients of his diet - vegetables, meat and fruit.  We add some oil for fat and calorie intake, but its hard.

What do people feed older children that cannot chew? Should I reintroduce these foods one at a time and watch for reactions?  We originally took him off of everything and his reflux went away and he was a much happier child.  I am so afraid of going back there! Soon he will be going to school, and I can't really send him there with baby food!  The whole point is to move him forward!!  Urghghghghghghhhh

Dream tease!

The problem with sleep is when you aren't getting it you get accustomed to the delirium, you hunker through with coffee and exercise, you just relinquish the thought of ever getting real zzz's, then the unthinkable happens.  You awake at 4 am and panic because no one has woken you up yet, then for the next three hours you wake and look at the clock wondering when the silence will end.

When the next night it happens again, you awake feeling so good!  You had forgotten how awesome a full 7 hours of sleep really feels!  You are excited and hopeful! Then WHAM! The next night they are up again, and now the problem is you were teased! You were reminded how it is to actually sleep uninterrupted!  So how do you go back again? I'm on my fifth cup of coffee and still feel like I am dragging ass!

My husband and I play a little game while in bed at night, we hear them get up and then its a stand off, pretending we are both still asleep, making sure not to make a move or sound until one of us caves and gets up.  then the game is really on, we take turns one after the other getting up trying to placate the children while essentially doing nothing really to satisfy the child.  I usually cave first, change the diaper and feed them, while he pretends he is still sleeping.  On rare occasion I will specifically ask him to get up and feed the boy child, but I know I can only do this about every three or four days, otherwise I am pushing my luck!

So how do we go back? I know that its within our grasp! 

Second thoughts...

I thought I was ready, I thought that with child #3, I knew the drill, was understanding about the transition, knew the benefits out weighed the negatives, but must admit... I'm having some second thoughts.

Thursday we went and registered Mr. Mr. for preschool, then we went and visited his classroom.  I knew he was tired, and really hasn't been himself these last few days, but wanted to get another feel of the room before we ship him off there in just a few short weeks.

The teacher welcomed us and the students were all sitting neatly in their circle time positions. I was able to fit the stroller on the end and we just observed what the kids were doing.  Mr. Mr. was just listening, soaking in the different sites and sounds.  Things were going good, until the kids were done with their calendar and began to sing songs.  These put Mr. Mr. on the edge.  10 little voices singing around him made him get that panic look on his face, but honestly he was holding it together, and so was I.  I usually get prepared to bolt,  to remove him for the stimuli as quick as possible, but even though I wanted to, I kept myself in check waiting... anticipating.  Things were going good...until... the big fat hairy spider song came.  This is the second verse that the children do to Itsy bitsy... not sure if it was the loud stomping and raised voices, or the change in routine... probably a combination of both.. but that was enough to put him over the edge.... so we left.

I know that it will be a change, and that he will get used to the routine and understand what is happening, and that it will be a process... but I'm still the mamma!  This is my baby!  I hate to see him upset, I worry that they won't know how to calm him, that he will be over stimulated and hate school! That he's too young, that when he comes home from a long day he will be extra miserable!

I don't remember being so worried when Mason and Dylan went off to school, but then again, I was working full time so they had been away from me since they were 6 weeks old!  Besides, Walker is different!  He is special!

I know this is normal and am not changing my mind.... its just nerve racking, I'm sure I will be following that school bus, tissues in hand.... 

A peak into a siblings mind....

While cleaning out Dylan's book bag, I came across the following:

Walker is my hero for many reasons. See Walker is delayed.  Which means he can't do what he's trying to do, like walk, crawl and talk.  With him being my brother I've learned many things. Like how to help hm in many ways.  Games an other activities to play with him, but what he's really shown me is no matter who or what you are, your still a person.  Now I love Walker very much and its sad to know he may never be like me, I wish that I could help. I wish I could get the money to get him a machine to make him a normal toddler. 

The big day

Individual Education Plan... i guess that is what it stands for... if not, its close enough, and its tomorrow. 

Yup, tomorrow, which means that me, daddio and mr. mr. will head over to the local public school and sit in front of a group of school administrators and educators and plan out what the next year of life for Mr. Mr. will be like. 

If you are part of the "special needs" crowd, this process comes with horror stories and celebrations.  I can understand how things, emotions and language can get out of hand when one is faced with discussing the weaknesses of their child, but honestly I am okay with that. It is the path to get him what he needs, and what I want him to have. I think I am pretty well prepared and feel confident that most of it is a "no brainer" if you will.  But on the flip side I don't want to assume (the whole ass out of you and me thing) anything. So I have my list of the issues, my wants, needs and demands... I've also been given some secret ammo if needed.

wish us luck!

Primo Sports

Its no secret that I have been having a difficult time adjusting to our new life.. a family with special needs.  Social events have been a mixture of guilt and frustration, with no one really at blame but the inner demons that dwell inside me.  After our last birthday party I swore off ever attending another one.  There is just no fun in sitting by yourself with two babies and watching the party go by, with kids yelling and jumping and eating cake.. all of which my child can't do. but the problem is that I really do like the people hosting the events, and I like their great kids!  I thought I had a solution last week, when a close friend was having a party for her three year old, I figured I would take Miss Poo and leave Mr. Mr. home for his therapies.  This would mean that i could mingle with the other moms and not have to juggle two little ones.

Well, the best laid plans.....

so here I was last week, last minute throwing both kids in the car, and off to the birthday party at a sports place.  

I figured I better make the best out of it and pysched myself up

.

 Walker was ready for the party and we found it easily.  Inside there were indoor soccer fields, goals, cones, and astro turf all throughout the building, and I was quite skeptical how exactly we would manage but figured to give it my all.  so I wheeled Walker right out there and pushed him around, making him kick the soccer ball and score a goal. (I was doing more exercise than I have in a long time!)

Coach Jimmy who was engaging the children really included Walker!

Walker did so great!  He did get a little scared under the parachute but otherwise was really enjoying it!  So were the other kids!  Even Miss Poo got in on the action.

So it was a great day!! I got valuable information about a Special Ed program they run on saturdays and Walker was pooped!

If I hadn't brought Walker they would not have known about us, and I woudn't have learned about their program! 

So things do happen for a reason!